SOoooooo Excited!!!!

This month has been hard for me, but very rewarding. I started my "Get Serious" Diet and exercise plan. I have cut fast foods and fried food completely out of my diet, they make me sick and if it isn't coming back up its doing it out the other end.....not exactly the best thing! A couple months ago we switched to Whole grains/ bread/pasta. And this month I have cut soda completely, I only drink water and have maybe had a couple sips of soda 2 times....but I have stuck with the water thing which is a HUGE deal cause I hate water (Who ever though up the crystal lite packets...you are a god!) Oh and we also switched to Turkey meat! I have only made a handful of dishes with it but it is Y-U-M!

The past 3 weeks I started the Jillian Micheal's 30 day shred and it has helped A LOT, this month I went from 183-ish lbs to 170! OMG! That was Charleigh at 9-11 mo old lol! for 3 weeks I did Workout 1, the first week it was a Lil intense but slowly I got to where I could handle it, and it makes me sweat! Last night and tonight I have done work out 2 and O-M-G~ that ain't no joke! I can barley breath at the end of it. But I know all my hard work is totally slowly paying off! I have set my new goal for the month to lose 13 more lbs by June 11th. We will see how it goes!

P.S. If anyone wants to get me a reward for my first 13 lb loss, I would love the Jillian Micheal's Fat Burner and Calorie Insinuator Combo Pack ;) LOL, Here's to the Next month of a skinnier me!

Need to surface

   Lately I feel like I am treading water just to get by, I feel so swamped lately with life. I am constantly questioning my parenting and the way that I deal with the conflicts my girls have 5,6, 20 times a day. I have noticed that I will always favor Rylee when they are fighting over something because Charleigh doesn't throw a fit over it, and if she does its nothing major and I can get her onto something else. Charleigh has been an angel for me, she is an incredibly amazing kid. She listens to me, never acts out and is just a huge blessing to me as my first child....Rylee is the exact opposite. Rylee non the less is a huge blessing as well, but a much harder one to humble.
  
   Then there is the never ending wife duties of housekeeper....or as I call myself the live in maid. If its not the kids toys, its the husbands shoes I am tripping over. The pile of dishes that no matter how many loads I do the sink is always full, and the huge monster of laundry over taking my bed that I need to fold but just REALLY don't want to. I need a nanny just so she can take my girls out for the day so I can clean that house without cleaning up the mess they made while I was cleaning their room.  Why cant they just sit still long enough for me to clean one room with out a mess being made at the same time?

   After this there is the Mommy duties, I am constantly questioning myself in this area as well....trying to do the best things for my girls, Like the 5,000 Preschool workbooks I bought last Sept. for Charleigh and she has only done 2 pages. Why didn't I stick with it? Why do I feel like there is not enough time in the day to be mom, wife and me?

   Oh! and then there is the Friend me...This is the area that I think I do OK in but there is always that conscious asking if I handled this situation OK or if I should have done it this way. I am always hoping that I am being the best friend that I can. I always try to make sure that if there is something bothering a friend that I pick up on it and am their for them, lately I feel that I have been so concerned with me that I have been slacking to them.

   And last but not least the Daughter/Sister me.....UGH! I know this area I suck in! My little sister is moving and have I made it known to her that its a huge step and that I wont be close anymore....does she care? Will she even miss me? I know she will miss her nieces but me? Then there is my mom, she has WAY to much on her plate, and I fear a huge breakdown soon, with my sister leaving, I just don't know how well she is going to handle it and I feel that lately she hasn't been able to really express to me here fears and frustrations.

    With all of this going on I have NO Me, Me time, I'm too busy being a Mom, Wife, Nanny/housekeeper, Sister, Daughter and Friend that I am exhausted at the end of the day that my me time is 20 minutes with Jillian Micheal's sweating my butt off (literally, I've lost 2 jean sizes:)) then  I hit the shower and hit the pillow....oh and Chris still isn't home  yet tonight cause he's in BFE, KS 3 hrs away for a baseball game...CRAP!
 
  I need to surface and catch my breath, I'm usually great at this juggling gig, but lately its getting to be way to much, I need a month of me time, a year of sleep and 10 years worth of no headaches. PLEASE!?!?!?

What am I thinking...I got laundry to fold, rooms to clean and a dinner to make!